Things Zack has Eaten that He Probably Shouldn't Have

Butterfly Bush flowers (they smell so good)
licked car tires
dog food
Paint
Permanent Marker
Crayons
Dog Food
Dog water
Vick's Vapor Rub
Lotion
bath water
dog food
bubbles in the bath
hair cream
dog food
lip balm
rolaids
lipstick
hand sanitizer

Things Zack Had Dumped on the Carpet

Here is a list of things that Zack has dumped on the *carpet, -put in the dog water or just ~dumped out. I'll probably have to update this post regularly.
*Olive Oil
*Massage Oil
*~Bubble Bath (2 bottles)
*~Hand Soap
*Baby Soap
*Lipstick
*~Pee
~Baby Mylacon (3 or 4 bottles)
~Infant Motrin
*Lotion
-Nose Spray
-Contact Solution
~Body wash
*Paint
*Baby Powder
~Shampoo
~formula
*Maddie's mostly empty bottles
* vitamin E oil
I'm sure there's more that I'm forgetting. I'll add to it if I remember and I'm sure Zack will find something else to dump soon.

I Eat It

Yesterday Zack came into the kitchen saying "I eat it." He had lipstick all over his mouth and hands. He's found some old lipstick of mine and bit it in half. We got a little on the carpet and I thought "oh well." I'm getting good about not caring what the carpet looks like. Then I went down the hall. At first I thought it was a large blood spot. No, it was lipstick. I just cleaned it up today. Guess what? It was surprising easy to do. Ammonia did the trick. Too bad I didn't grab the camera. He did look cute with his lipstick on.

We Don't Usually Pee on the Side of the car...BUT

Zack, Maddie, and I took the car to Costco today to have the flat tire repaired. Three hours, two hot dogs, one bottle, one really messy ice cream, one spilled pop, two bathroom trips later, and $433 poorer we left. We stopped at Target for a sale that wasn't really there and by then I'd had it. I loaded the kids in the car and was strapping Maddie in when Zack said, "Mommy, pee." I'm always thrilled when he tells me but I just didn't have it in me to unload and walk back into the store. So, I took Zack out stood him behind the open door and told him to pee. I heard some ladies walk by so I quickly pulled up his underwear. When they were gone he finished. I had to pour a bottled water on the side of the car and explain that usually we don't pee outside but Mommy had just had it today.

Best Brother Ever (most of the time)

Zack loves Madelynn. He kisses her every chance that he gets and he says "A goo" to her all of the time. When we drive in the car, he reaches over and holds her hand. He gives her BIG pushes on her swing and sometimes tries to climb in it with her. The other day I caught him climbing in the crib with her.

The Great Outdoors

Well we tried pooping outside since that seems to be Zack's pooping spot of choice. Zack though it was great fun. It started out like this.









Then Noodle stole Zack's underwear.

It was a little cold outside so it turned into this.






And then finally it turned into this.








He watched tv for a while but never pooped. Oh well it was worth a try.

Poopisode #4

When we got home from the store I immediately tried to get Zack to poop on the potty. He had picked out special treats for just that and was eager to eat them. Not eager enough. After trying FOREVER. I started getting ready to go to Grandma and Grandpa's house for Amy's b-day. Of course I kept asking Zack to put on his underwear (I keep hoping he'll actually do it). He wandered outside in his bare necessities. Pretty soon Lucy (our dog) brought something in and I heard "plop" as she dropped it on the carpet. It was poo. I scooped it up and ran out side. There was Zack and Noodle(our other dog). Noodle was eating Yuck and double Yuck and I think Zack had a shovel. He keeps pooping outside so today I think I'll take the potty outside and see if we can put the two together. You never know.

Shopping Trip

Remember how I swore last week that I wouldn't take the kids shopping again? Well apparently I forgot. The shopping part wasn't so bad. Macey's has cool car shopping carts that the kids sits up high next to you (within grabbing distance). Zack loved it. When we were done I took advantage of the "help out" even though I only had 3 bags. I love good customer service. After loading the car I remembered Zack needed to go to the bathroom. So we headed back to the store. At one point I had to chase him across the parking lot. Maddie was in the sling bouncing along. Zack peeped but would not pull up his pants. I had learned from past experiences that it is really hard to squat down and help him with Maddie in the sling (ok, so I got stuck a little bit in a stall at costco). So, I told him he could just walk around with his pants down and see how easy that was. Natural consequences right? He didn't care. He washed his hands, used a ton of paper towels and was ready to walk out in the store and show everyone his little brown bum. Finally after I realized there was no negotiating with him, I reached down and pulled them back up. I did contemplate just letting him walk to the car that was but thought someone might report me to DCFS. We got all buckled and I realized there was a discrepancy on my receipt so out we went again. This time I put his leash on. See I do learn.

haircut

OK, so I admit I experimented with Zack's hair today. I cut a part on the side of his head. Does anyone have glue that will put hair back?

Grandpa Where are You?

Saturday Zack helped Grandpa Maddux work on the bead board in Madelynn's room. He played hard with Grandma Maddux in the sandbox and singing songs. By the end of the night, he was sad to see them go. As they were leaving he ran to the window to wave goodbye. They yelled "I love you." Zack yelled back "I love you." It was so clear and the first time we can remember him actually saying that. They yelled "I love you too." Zack yelled, "I love you too!" back. It was so cute. The next morning I heard him in his room. He called out to me. Of course I continued to lay in bed to see what he would do (hopefully go back to sleep). Then I heard him say "Grandpa, where are you?"

Clean Up #1 on Aisle 1

Grocery shopping gone bad. I took Wade with me to Smith's this afternoon in the hopes that he would help while I did my major coupon shopping this week. It was a good thing that he was there, although I wish I'd left them all home with Chrissom and saved myself the hassle. We'd been at the store for about 45 minutes. Maddie was in the sling on my shoulder, Zack in the grocery cart and Wade wandering somewhere looking at cool things. I was tired, Zack was bored, he kept trying to open groceries and was being super spazzy (if that's even a word). I was on my last aisle looking at shampoo when Zack got that look on his face and a steady stream shot down his leg through the cart and onto the floor. I insisted that he stop peeing this instant. He just looked at me like, "am I peeing, I didn't notice," and kept going until there was a huge puddle under our cart. I yelled for Wade who had wandered off to stay by Zack as I went to the bathroom for paper towels. The towel dispenser was an automatic one that wasn't automatic enough for me. Finally loaded with a wad of towels, I hurried back to the cart. Let's just say the towels were insufficient, and it's not so easy to bend over with a 14 pound baby hanging around your neck. So I went to customer service (I'm glad I wasn't at Walmart), and explained "My son just peed his pants in the shampoo aisle." I went back and sent Wade for more towels. Then a poor Smith's worker came and finished up for me. We quickly checked out (after getting kicked out of the express lane. Oops, I did thank the checker for telling me I was in an express lane before I had unloaded the cart). Zack insisted on standing up while I was paying so everyone could see his soaking wet bum. I stripped him in the parking lot and put on a pull up I had conveniently stashed in my purse. Wish I'd put it on before the store. Wade put all of the groceries in the car while I was doing this. Hopefully I'll learn from Zack's mishaps and Maddie will have a perfect potty training experience. I'll keep dreaming. I wonder if they'll lend Wade to me on a permanent basis. It's nice to have another pair of hands even if his does wander sometimes.

A Picture's Worth a Thousand Words

Oh Baby...soap

Zack came to me with goo all over his hands and said "baby." yep, he dumped the whole bottle of baby wash on the living room carpet. He's been trying to dump it in the tub for weeks and I've tried to be careful to put it up, but I forgot (apparently I'm not allowed to do that). To make matters worse, I was on the phone so I just took the bottle away. He went out and dipped his goo hands in the sand then brought it in and rubbed the carpet into a lather. Oh there's more. Then he found the bottle and decided to drink the rest. No I did not call poison control. No I have not cleaned it up yet. I'm saving this one for Chrissom. besides, it smells really nice.

Poop and Double Poop

Yep, while I was on the phone Zack was pooping in the backyard again. I found him in the sand box without any pants on again. Is there ever going to be an end to this Potty Training "crap?"

Dogs Poop Outside, but You're not a Dog

I sat down for a few minutes to rock Maddie to sleep. Zack was running around in just shorts because he got his shirt wet in the tub (another story). I kept telling him to put his shirt on but there's not a lot I can do while rocking Maddie. Pretty soon I here a loud noise coming from outside and Lucy barking like Zack is teasing her. I put Maddie down and headed outside. I found Zack buck naked, using a toy rake to hit a basketball (thus making Lucy mad). He greeted me with the word, "POOP." Sure enough he'd taken off his clothes and pooped on the lawn or pooped in his underwear and then taken them off to dump the poop on the lawn. The dogs wanted to eat it and I think that is why he was defending it with the rake. So after he ran and jumped on the tramp (still naked), I grabbed him and took him inside. On the way to the bathroom I explained, "Zack, dogs poop outside, but you're not a dog."

Help Yourself..I Guess

I guess Zack wanted some "bum, bum" (that's code for gum gum). He used the bucket of dog food as a stool and climbed on up. He was pretty pleased with himself. I found him crunching away on some random piece of candy with two suckers in his hand. Time to move the candy. Which makes me wonder who invented the phrase "keep out of reach of children?" It's on everything that Zack tastes, eats, and licks and somehow these things are always within his reach. I know I'm to fault some of the time but I'm pretty sure who ever invented the phrase never met a child like Super Zack.

Zack Finally Takes A Nap

Zack would not take a nap today. It didn't help that when I sat down with him to read stories, Maddie decided to cry. I tried rocking them both but the kid wiggles too much and I'm not talking about the baby. Then I tried making him stay in his bed. Ha Ha. Then I just shut his bedroom door. 10 minutes later he came out, I went in, there was a big mess. Then I put him in bed and said, "If you get out again, you'll be in time out for TEN MINUTES!" Like he even knows what that means. He got right out of bed so after ten minutes of sitting on his chair, I gave up. He played with Wader the whole afternoon, came in when I was making dinner. I asked him to go potty. He hit me so back in time out he went. I started mixing up some cornbread and he was sitting so quietly that I left him (it was only like 5 minutes tops. When Maddie started fussing I noticed him dozing off. Now he's sleeping peacefully. I guess he finally held still long enough to go to sleep. HMMM does this pose any possibilities for naps in the future? Nah, guess not. I think I'll go lay him down though.

That's dog food...It's for dogs

Bruzy Baby was over today. I put out 3 dishes of food, one for each dog. Zack was loving Bruzer while he was eating, as in hugging him and petting him. Bruzer is the only dog around here that lets zack do that so I guess Bruzer was his new hero, because pretty soon he was at a bowl on the gound eating the dog food. I tell him at least twice a week "That's dog food, it's for dogs."

POTTY TALK! 11/2/09

For the record, Zack peed his pants twice today and pooped in the potty once. I thought the pooping in the potty (2nd time in like a month) was worth the two peeps. He also went outside to play in just a shirt and panties (oops) I mean underwear. He came back in just wearing a shirt and holding his underwear, declaring "Poop."
"where did you poop?" I asked. He pointed outside. I made him show me. He took me into the garden where Noodle was scrounging around. I didn't know if I should believe him but there were skid marks in his Oscar the Grouch undies. Maybe he buried it?
This picture was taken a few days ago, but it's classic Zack in his underwear going outside to play. Notice the padapah (that's twoyearese for spatula) his favorite "toy" and Mommy's shoes.

Does it has a Flavor? 11/2/09

Zack tastes everything. Yes he is 2 and should have out grown putting things in his mouth by now, but he still does it. So we are always asking "Does it has a flavor?" a phrase stolen from Adam Koford's "Laugh Out Loud Cats" comic strip. Today I was trying to get one item on my long list done...the dishes. Zack came whining at me for water. I didn't want to remove my rubber gloves, get a sippy cup etc, etc, etc. So I told him he was a big boy and could go get a drink in the bathroom. We keep Dixie cups in our bathroom. He took off at a run. A couple of minutes later my mother's intuition kicked in (I"m learning to listen and obey this immediately!). I went in search of my favorite two year old to find him with a Dixie cup filling it up in his bathroom. "Fantastic," I thought, "he's learning how to take care of himself." I told him that he was doing a great job and turned off the water. Then made the mistake of leaving him in the bathroom. When am I going to learn that he always finds something to do in the bathroom? I went back to washing Maddie's bottles. A couple of minutes went by when the good old MI (Mother's intuition) started nagging me. I went back to check and sure enough, Super Zack had found a jar of Baby Vick's Vapor Rub. He had a huge goop of it on his fingers and was stuffing it into his mouth. I immediately started wiping it out of his mouth. When I called poison control they asked, "Was he spitting it out or did he seem to enjoy it?" The answer was "He enjoyed it." Lucky for us he didn't swallow enough to harm him. Did you know that eucalyptus oil can be poisonous. Yah, I googled it.